Oh, G-d, can't-- breathe--!

[ysobelle]

http://vandonovan.livejournal.com/1088311.html?page=1#comments


Not only must you read the entry, which is just...TITANIC in its wrongness, but you must also read the comments, which at one point-- no, several points, made me CRY with laughing.


Also, don't miss http://naamah-darling.livejournal.com/141951.html , which is linked therein, but I just wanted to make sure you actually saw it.


Oh, G-d, thank you, mseuphrates!

Comments

[fiannaharpar.livejournal.com]

*mops brains off of desk*

[autumnyte.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahaha. Oh, dear lord. I haven't laughed this hard since I read Chapter 5 of My Immortal.

[hughcasey.livejournal.com]

I believe I've hurt myself.

[morriganswitch.livejournal.com]

Did you SEE that drawing?

I'm going to be having nightmares about arrow heads for weeks now.

[patsytheloomer.livejournal.com]

I can say, without fear of hyperbole, that the ...passage... in question is a slew of simile and megaton of metaphor.


and... how does one expand all the threads so one does not have to click eternally upon the vast field of links?

[fondor.livejournal.com]

Auggh! I thought you loved me!

[hederaivy.livejournal.com]

And they said fantasy fiction was all bad....

[vixynne.livejournal.com]

I had to post a reply to that one...and had to share it with you too!

*****************************************************

"The nipples rose like mecury with her heat"???

Ron. Dood. Spellcheck. Because in a chapter of wasted words, nobody likes a bad speller.

MERcury. You know, that silvery liquid? In thermometers?

As in, "The mercury plummeted like a stone. Like a stone dropped into the storm-tossed sea from the beak of a despairing albatross, an albatross with snowy white wings. With wings of cloud, of vapor, of mist, of other words that mean gaseous form of breathable air; the air that wrapped 'round the celestial orb of Gaea like an enveloping embrace in the endless blackness of space. The black, hungry void of space. Hungry as a newborn child, hungry as Death, hungry as the devotees of the fragrant ganja weed as they contemplate the menu at Wendy's after a long night of camaraderie. The camaraderie of comrades, the friendship that dwells among those who are friends with one another, like people who have known each other for many years. Years, gathered like sheaves of wheat, like stones on the beach, like profile comments on Myspace, like herpes at a hookers' reunion, like things people gather. The people, who fade before Time as the grass fades with the turning of the seasons, the people who rise, and fall, and rise again. Like mecury. Damnit...*erases* Like MERcury."

[ysobelle.livejournal.com]

I hate you.

I love you.


I weep.