Another bad day.
Jan. 26th, 2009 12:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
ysobelleStill sick. Still tired. ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hederaivy, I'm taking your excellent advice and thinking about the next trip, but....
No call from C. I emailed, what, four times when I was in England? Called twice once I was home. I don't think there's a women's mag on earth that would say anything but, "He's just not that into you." I find, surprisingly, that this hurts. I didn't think I was unsafely emotionally involved. But of course, that's silly. I was involved enough to be intimate with him. I got scalded, and I've learned a lesson I knew perfectly well in the first place. I should have known better. No, I DID know better. I suppose I just thought better of him, and of my own judgement. If he does call...I have no idea what to say. I know he's had a rough few weeks, but I'm hurt, and I'm angry. And those are emotions I have trouble expressing to people.
Work is making me crazy. I said I wouldn't close unless it was an emergency. I'm scheduled to close twice this week and once next. I have my own work to do, and I can't do that when my store closes at 10pm. I also don't want to work 40 hours a week. I understand that we're short-staffed, but that's not my problem, either. I want my weekends back, and I want regular hours. I'm too old for this shit.
I should have tried to contact Teacher Cal. Why didn't I? It doesn't matter that he wouldn't have known-- I didn't know that when I was thinking of him two years ago. He changed my life. I never looked back.
Apparently, I do indeed need my Apollo lamp. It was Spring at Windsor Castle. It was Spring in Stratford. It is not Spring in Philadelphia.
Work continues on captioning my photos.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ysobelle/collections/72157612453241149/
hederaivy, I'm taking your excellent advice and thinking about the next trip, but....No call from C. I emailed, what, four times when I was in England? Called twice once I was home. I don't think there's a women's mag on earth that would say anything but, "He's just not that into you." I find, surprisingly, that this hurts. I didn't think I was unsafely emotionally involved. But of course, that's silly. I was involved enough to be intimate with him. I got scalded, and I've learned a lesson I knew perfectly well in the first place. I should have known better. No, I DID know better. I suppose I just thought better of him, and of my own judgement. If he does call...I have no idea what to say. I know he's had a rough few weeks, but I'm hurt, and I'm angry. And those are emotions I have trouble expressing to people.
Work is making me crazy. I said I wouldn't close unless it was an emergency. I'm scheduled to close twice this week and once next. I have my own work to do, and I can't do that when my store closes at 10pm. I also don't want to work 40 hours a week. I understand that we're short-staffed, but that's not my problem, either. I want my weekends back, and I want regular hours. I'm too old for this shit.
I should have tried to contact Teacher Cal. Why didn't I? It doesn't matter that he wouldn't have known-- I didn't know that when I was thinking of him two years ago. He changed my life. I never looked back.
Apparently, I do indeed need my Apollo lamp. It was Spring at Windsor Castle. It was Spring in Stratford. It is not Spring in Philadelphia.
Work continues on captioning my photos.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/ysobelle/collections/72157612453241149/