Confusion.
Apr. 23rd, 2007 02:52 amIt's been a really surreal day or two. Not a lot I feel I want to share, or even really need to, much as I adore my fList, but...someone I love has opened up a lot to me, and some of it is scary. Scary, dark, searingly painful, tragic-- and there's nothing I can do but listen and hold hands. I'm always the one with good advice, but this...this is...stuff that makes me feel stupidly helpless.
In other news, I had someone half-jokingly suggest we have children together. Unfortunately, it's someone exceedingly tall. All I can think is: OW! But again: surreal.
Just before bed, I watched two documentaries in a row on the super morbidly obese. We're talking five to seven hundred pounds. The first focussed on a clinic in New York and some of its patients: people who live there, fighting for their lives, needing forklifts to get in and out of bed-- and they still sneak takeout. The second concentrated on what food addiction is, and how four people are-- or are not-- fighting it. I found myself cringeing in acknowledgement at some of their comments: "I think about food first thing in the morning and last thing at night." "I feel guilty after I've eaten." "I know I shouldn't, but I do it anyway."
Someone once said it's the one addiction no addict can ever break. That's a frightening thought: you can never quit, you can never go cold turkey, you can never walk away. The only thing you can ever do is try to manage it.
I took Clue for a brisk walk, drank some water, and am now going to bed.
In other news, I had someone half-jokingly suggest we have children together. Unfortunately, it's someone exceedingly tall. All I can think is: OW! But again: surreal.
Just before bed, I watched two documentaries in a row on the super morbidly obese. We're talking five to seven hundred pounds. The first focussed on a clinic in New York and some of its patients: people who live there, fighting for their lives, needing forklifts to get in and out of bed-- and they still sneak takeout. The second concentrated on what food addiction is, and how four people are-- or are not-- fighting it. I found myself cringeing in acknowledgement at some of their comments: "I think about food first thing in the morning and last thing at night." "I feel guilty after I've eaten." "I know I shouldn't, but I do it anyway."
Someone once said it's the one addiction no addict can ever break. That's a frightening thought: you can never quit, you can never go cold turkey, you can never walk away. The only thing you can ever do is try to manage it.
I took Clue for a brisk walk, drank some water, and am now going to bed.